Bikurgurl · Family · Family First! · The-Year-Of-Quality · Writing

Remembering to sign my name: Mom

When I write my children notes, send them texts, write an email, I often stop and think about who is sending this: is it ME or is it MOM?

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Crazy, right? When did my persona split, become two…when did this divergence happen?

For many parents, this happens early on – parental and public lives are decidedly cleaved. Work at the Office. Girls Nights Out. Date Night. Pursing dreams that are, *GASP*, not your children.

For me, this is just beginning. I wasn’t sure I ever wanted to get married, really. I didn’t think I could ever have enough empathy, or bandwidth, to care for anyone other than myself. Working two jobs, paying student loans, living the single life.

Selfish? Yes. Realistic? At that time: Yes.

But ultimately: No.

Once I met my husband, I began to see the possibility of being married. Here was a man who was self-made. He came from humble beginnings and followed his dreams. He captured my heart, my imagination, my future.

We fell in love, he proposed. We got married, we had children. We moved cross-country, we moved around. We struggled, we argued, we made up, we moved on.

Fast forward 14 years, and I have two remarkable children. My husband and I are so proud of each of them, the men they are becoming. We are their parents, but we are also their mentors in many ways. We try to do the right thing, model the behavior and words, and are learning to adult along with them.

So when it comes to the words I write for them, the syntax, the placement: I am always Mom.

@Bikurgurl_watermark

What roles do you find yourself filling?

13 thoughts on “Remembering to sign my name: Mom

  1. Nice. Lovely true story. And yes, from what you describe I can see how you became ‘Mom.’ I do not have kids of my own (yet) but someday maybe. I see with my friends, how quickly (to me) they became, whatever their position at work was/is and now having kids. How the ‘Mom’ title just fits them. Similar to the way, when I visit, I’m Auntie Amanda to their kids or to my cousins I’m much older than. Great post.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You’re so sweet! For me, I fell in so naturally from a place where I never thought I would get married, have children. Now that I’m here, I wouldn’t want it any other way 😉 Thank you for stopping by and giving me insight — reminding me of myself at your age 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  2. awwww. there is something heartwarming in your straightforward way of telling your story, girl. 🙂

    As to your question, it is fulfilling to be the daughter of my parents. Life has been tough for them and for me. As the eldest, I have experienced the worst. But I am not helping them and things are not great but are better. 🙂

    Great post, dear!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s a tough thing to transition from being a child, to an adult, to an adult of children. Transitions in life are part of living, it’s how we deal with them. I’m learning to adult with my children and I’ve found no better company 😉 Give yourself, and your parents, grace and space; while we want to be everything to everyone, our forgiveness and peace must first come from within for ourselves ❤ Sending you happy thoughts!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. 🙂 this is so beautifully written, I love the way you talk about your husband, he must be proud. I have a toddler and a baby; to the toddler I am not only mom, but a playmate. We build blocks together, play hide and seek… to the baby I am simply Mom.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for your kind compliment! You are in a super fun stage of life — busy, but fun! Toddlers just want to be with you, do what you want to do, easy to play with and have fun – very low expectations and high happiness potential! At the time, I couldn’t think of a happier place in parenthood. Challenges? Sure. But then you figure out the issues, iron them out, but before you know it the children grow, change, and you face new challenges, fulfilling new expectations — of your children, of yourself. I’m finally learning that I need to fill my own proverbial cup – find my center, calm – giving myself grace and space. I wish the same happiness, grace and space, to you 🙂

      Like

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